Standing
Outside the Circle
by: Ulysses Ybiernas ♦ October 19, 2010
Invisible alliances create visible inequalities
I find myself questioning the strange absence of motivation, the dull, persistent cynicism that keeps inspiration just out of reach. It is not the work itself that drains me, but the people who surround it. There is an unspoken pressure in the air, a suffocating sense of confinement, as though every movement must be measured, every action pre-approved by invisible standards. I feel it constantly, the weight of expectation shaped not by truth, but by how others choose to see me, or worse, by what they have already decided I can never become.
In such an environment, growth feels like an illusion. Advancement is not earned through merit or effort, but filtered through a quiet, insular system, a clique of sorts, where belonging matters more than ability. To exist outside of it is to stand at a closed gate, watching opportunities pass by, reserved only for those who fit their mold or are willing to become something less authentic just to belong. To penetrate such a group requires either conformity or compromise, and I find neither option tolerable.
I cling, perhaps stubbornly, to the belief that soon change is inevitable, that something will shift, that the tension will fracture. Yet experience tells me otherwise. Any flicker of progress is often extinguished just as quickly, swallowed by hesitation, fear, or the quiet resistance of those who benefit from keeping things exactly as they are. Whether it is indecision, cowardice, or the silent refusal of those in control, the result is always the same: prejudices dressed as stability.
And so I am left with a question that grows heavier with each passing day, what am I to do?
Do I surrender to the current, allowing it to carry me wherever it pleases? Or do I resist, risking isolation by standing against a system that thrives on silent compliance?
Perhaps the more urgent question is not about them, but about myself: how do I create a space where I can feel both fulfilled and at ease? Happiness and comfort are not luxuries, they are necessities, and they must be cultivated deliberately.
If this so-called invisible circle thrives on uniformity and exclusion, then its greatest weakness lies in diversity. This is exactly the kind of environment the corporate culture of this company is trying to establish. By embracing differences, it becomes possible to disrupt the quiet monopoly they hold. Those who have long relied on invisible affiliations and unspoken privileges may finally be challenged, making room for those who truly deserve recognition.
Still, idealism alone is not enough. Pragmatism must guide me. I must remain grounded, objective, and deliberate in my actions. I cannot allow shallow interactions or negative undercurrents to dictate my state of mind. No personal dealings but professionalism in its purest form, must be my armor.
The circle persists, it is real, and it is strong. But as long as it causes no direct harm to my stability yet, I will remain observant rather than reactive. Watchful, not fearful. Aware of its reach, yet unwilling to be entangled by it.
For now, I endure, but I do so with open eyes, steady resolve, and the quiet determination to outgrow the confines set before me.
“The circle is not built on merit, but on belonging.”
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